archives
03/28/2004 - 04/04/2004
04/04/2004 - 04/11/2004
04/11/2004 - 04/18/2004
04/18/2004 - 04/25/2004
04/25/2004 - 05/02/2004
05/02/2004 - 05/09/2004
05/09/2004 - 05/16/2004
05/16/2004 - 05/23/2004
05/23/2004 - 05/30/2004
05/30/2004 - 06/06/2004
06/06/2004 - 06/13/2004
06/13/2004 - 06/20/2004
06/20/2004 - 06/27/2004
06/27/2004 - 07/04/2004
07/04/2004 - 07/11/2004
07/11/2004 - 07/18/2004
07/18/2004 - 07/25/2004
07/25/2004 - 08/01/2004
08/01/2004 - 08/08/2004
08/08/2004 - 08/15/2004
08/15/2004 - 08/22/2004
08/22/2004 - 08/29/2004
08/29/2004 - 09/05/2004
09/05/2004 - 09/12/2004
09/12/2004 - 09/19/2004
09/19/2004 - 09/26/2004
09/26/2004 - 10/03/2004
10/03/2004 - 10/10/2004
10/10/2004 - 10/17/2004
10/17/2004 - 10/24/2004
10/24/2004 - 10/31/2004
10/31/2004 - 11/07/2004
11/07/2004 - 11/14/2004
11/14/2004 - 11/21/2004
11/21/2004 - 11/28/2004
11/28/2004 - 12/05/2004
12/05/2004 - 12/12/2004
12/12/2004 - 12/19/2004
12/19/2004 - 12/26/2004
12/26/2004 - 01/02/2005
01/02/2005 - 01/09/2005
01/09/2005 - 01/16/2005
01/16/2005 - 01/23/2005
01/23/2005 - 01/30/2005
01/30/2005 - 02/06/2005
02/06/2005 - 02/13/2005
02/13/2005 - 02/20/2005
02/20/2005 - 02/27/2005
02/27/2005 - 03/06/2005
03/06/2005 - 03/13/2005
03/13/2005 - 03/20/2005
03/20/2005 - 03/27/2005
03/27/2005 - 04/03/2005
04/03/2005 - 04/10/2005
04/10/2005 - 04/17/2005
04/17/2005 - 04/24/2005
04/24/2005 - 05/01/2005
05/01/2005 - 05/08/2005
05/08/2005 - 05/15/2005
05/15/2005 - 05/22/2005
05/22/2005 - 05/29/2005
05/29/2005 - 06/05/2005
06/05/2005 - 06/12/2005
06/12/2005 - 06/19/2005
06/19/2005 - 06/26/2005
06/26/2005 - 07/03/2005
07/03/2005 - 07/10/2005
07/10/2005 - 07/17/2005
07/17/2005 - 07/24/2005
07/24/2005 - 07/31/2005
07/31/2005 - 08/07/2005
08/07/2005 - 08/14/2005
08/14/2005 - 08/21/2005
08/21/2005 - 08/28/2005
08/28/2005 - 09/04/2005
09/04/2005 - 09/11/2005
09/11/2005 - 09/18/2005
09/18/2005 - 09/25/2005
09/25/2005 - 10/02/2005
10/02/2005 - 10/09/2005
10/09/2005 - 10/16/2005
10/16/2005 - 10/23/2005
10/23/2005 - 10/30/2005
10/30/2005 - 11/06/2005
11/06/2005 - 11/13/2005
11/13/2005 - 11/20/2005
11/20/2005 - 11/27/2005
11/27/2005 - 12/04/2005
12/04/2005 - 12/11/2005
12/11/2005 - 12/18/2005
12/18/2005 - 12/25/2005
12/25/2005 - 01/01/2006
01/01/2006 - 01/08/2006
01/08/2006 - 01/15/2006
01/15/2006 - 01/22/2006
01/22/2006 - 01/29/2006
01/29/2006 - 02/05/2006
02/05/2006 - 02/12/2006
02/12/2006 - 02/19/2006
02/19/2006 - 02/26/2006
02/26/2006 - 03/05/2006
03/05/2006 - 03/12/2006
03/12/2006 - 03/19/2006
03/19/2006 - 03/26/2006
03/26/2006 - 04/02/2006
04/02/2006 - 04/09/2006
04/09/2006 - 04/16/2006
04/16/2006 - 04/23/2006
04/23/2006 - 04/30/2006
04/30/2006 - 05/07/2006
05/07/2006 - 05/14/2006
05/14/2006 - 05/21/2006
05/21/2006 - 05/28/2006
05/28/2006 - 06/04/2006
06/04/2006 - 06/11/2006
06/11/2006 - 06/18/2006
06/18/2006 - 06/25/2006
06/25/2006 - 07/02/2006
07/02/2006 - 07/09/2006
07/09/2006 - 07/16/2006
07/16/2006 - 07/23/2006
07/23/2006 - 07/30/2006
07/30/2006 - 08/06/2006
08/06/2006 - 08/13/2006
08/13/2006 - 08/20/2006
08/20/2006 - 08/27/2006
08/27/2006 - 09/03/2006
09/03/2006 - 09/10/2006
09/10/2006 - 09/17/2006
09/17/2006 - 09/24/2006
09/24/2006 - 10/01/2006
10/01/2006 - 10/08/2006
10/08/2006 - 10/15/2006
10/15/2006 - 10/22/2006
10/22/2006 - 10/29/2006
10/29/2006 - 11/05/2006
11/05/2006 - 11/12/2006
11/12/2006 - 11/19/2006
11/19/2006 - 11/26/2006
11/26/2006 - 12/03/2006
12/03/2006 - 12/10/2006
12/10/2006 - 12/17/2006
12/17/2006 - 12/24/2006
12/24/2006 - 12/31/2006
12/31/2006 - 01/07/2007
01/07/2007 - 01/14/2007
01/14/2007 - 01/21/2007
01/21/2007 - 01/28/2007
01/28/2007 - 02/04/2007
02/04/2007 - 02/11/2007
02/11/2007 - 02/18/2007
02/18/2007 - 02/25/2007
02/25/2007 - 03/04/2007
03/11/2007 - 03/18/2007
03/18/2007 - 03/25/2007
04/08/2007 - 04/15/2007
04/15/2007 - 04/22/2007
04/22/2007 - 04/29/2007
04/29/2007 - 05/06/2007
05/06/2007 - 05/13/2007
05/13/2007 - 05/20/2007
05/27/2007 - 06/03/2007
06/10/2007 - 06/17/2007
06/17/2007 - 06/24/2007
06/24/2007 - 07/01/2007
07/01/2007 - 07/08/2007
07/15/2007 - 07/22/2007
09/02/2007 - 09/09/2007
09/16/2007 - 09/23/2007
10/07/2007 - 10/14/2007
10/21/2007 - 10/28/2007
11/18/2007 - 11/25/2007
11/25/2007 - 12/02/2007
12/02/2007 - 12/09/2007
12/09/2007 - 12/16/2007
12/16/2007 - 12/23/2007
12/23/2007 - 12/30/2007
12/30/2007 - 01/06/2008
01/06/2008 - 01/13/2008
01/13/2008 - 01/20/2008
01/20/2008 - 01/27/2008
01/27/2008 - 02/03/2008
02/03/2008 - 02/10/2008
02/17/2008 - 02/24/2008
02/24/2008 - 03/02/2008
03/02/2008 - 03/09/2008
03/09/2008 - 03/16/2008
03/23/2008 - 03/30/2008
03/30/2008 - 04/06/2008
04/06/2008 - 04/13/2008
04/20/2008 - 04/27/2008
04/27/2008 - 05/04/2008
05/11/2008 - 05/18/2008
05/18/2008 - 05/25/2008
06/01/2008 - 06/08/2008
06/08/2008 - 06/15/2008
06/15/2008 - 06/22/2008
06/22/2008 - 06/29/2008
06/29/2008 - 07/06/2008
07/20/2008 - 07/27/2008
Monday, April 23, 2007
Three Times is a Charm
Semi frequent readers of the blog (Cup in eye?) will know that once every few months in Toronto, someone eggs me.The first time I got got was on College Street in the summertime. Ben and Meghan were thurrr and can attest to the carnage. They got me right between the backpack and the back. Thankfully, it was warm so I could take my shirt off and rollerblade home.
The second time was on the Bathurst bus a couple months after the first incident. The windows were up so everyone was ok. My sister was there that time. I can't say I was the target specifically this time, but I was visible from the assaulter's vantage point.
The third time, the time that proves that I am being targeted by egg-chuckers in this city, happened just last night. Salmon Eye were walking home along St Clair just west of Bathurst at about quarter to two in the a.m. when I hear something that sounds like a glass bottle smashing. After initial stun, we realize we were the intended targets of drive-by egg chuckers! Two eggs are dripping down the construction site plyboard walls.
"What the fuck! It's a fucking egg! How the fuck is this even possible! This is the third time I have had a fucking egg thrown at me in the city of Toronto by a total stranger."
Sam was just as shocked. There was a woman walking ahead of us who kind of glanced around, but kept on going. The eggers did not target her, nor the next woman ahead of her. Salmon Eye talked about how bad it woulda been to get hit. I want to put out a message to all eggers in the GTA, because I know you read my blog and target me. Listen: if you must throw eggs at people for the purpose of nasty prankery, take the eggs out of the fridge two hours before you chuck them. A cold egg is much harder than a soft one and can cause real injury.
As Salmon Eye continued down the street, we saw two guys around our age who seemed fairly drunk, even from a distance. "Are these the eggers?" I thought to myself. Well, no matter, because there's no way we could take them. As we got closer, the one guy in a rugby shirt asks me, "Hey, did you guys get egged?" He had yolk all down his sleeve and some on his shoulder. His friend, in a Queen's University jacket was untouched. The rugby shirt guy showed us his bottom forearm, "They got me right here. It really hurt, it's gonna fuckin' bruise up". When I got back home I noticed I got some eggwhite splashback on my jeans. At least I didn't get a fucking welt on my head.
When people ask me, "Is Toronto a safe city?" I say sure. I ride public transit constantly and no one ever tries to pick your pocket, I've never been stuck up. Girls tell me dirty old men can be a problem, but me, I just have a problem with eggers.
I wonder what Redman would do if someone threw an egg at him?
