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Saturday, April 03, 2004

WHY didn't I take the bet?! 

Spent 6 hours in the bloody chemistry lecture hall studying for my genetics final on monday.

I got through half.

Feeling rather put out, I looked to the Leafs-Sens game to give my spirits a boost. Needless to say, the 6-0 shutout for Toronto made me VERY happy indeed. Yeaaaah boys! (My man - Tucker - is still out with a groin pull, but I love him anyways. He was there in spirit.)

I went for a victory run around Ring Road (how stupid is it that females can't go out at night without having to worry about stupid male superiority complexes. HUH!) and managed to cut my time down to 14 minutes - the road is 2.5k long. Not bad for my third night out running...I hope to shave it down to about 12 minutes and start going 5k before I go back to Toronto.

Decent Saturday, on the whole. On one hand I can't wait for exams to be over, and on the other - I really don't want to go back to Toronto.

Good luck with finals guys!

P.S. Jacob -- you are BRILLIANT.

I have cash. Sweet. 

My employer/client was nice enough to come by my place with not one but two cheques with my name on them both. So now I can not go into debt and also have money for food/beer.

Now if only I weren't sick and coughing up shit, it'd be a pretty good day.

I'm Makin' My Own Blog... UPSTAIRS!!! 

Well, to all you people who missed the bowling last night, I hope you feel a great sense of loss. 'Cuz you really lost out, is all. Quick story from said bowling: We were all goin' back on the subway, and I sees this one 30-40 something guy pickin' his nose. So's I turn to Neil et al. and say, somewhat louder than I thought I was saying it, "Hey Neil, who picks his nose is public? -THAT GUY!" (indicates that guy by pointing finger) I'm pretty sure I humiliated him quite a bit dere, but it was all in good fun and I was too drunk to show strangers any courtesy, so what am I gonna do?

The Order Of The White Hand... 

...now consists of MT, Binje, Neil, Sam. Not Saruman.

Does breaking a beer bottle @ the bowlerama warrant getting banned from there? MT and I were trying to get a game of Air Hockey started after bowling, but the table took tokens and the token machine was fuckin broken. So we tried to use coffee stir sticks as coins, but unlike at UFA, that didn't work. When that didn't work, MT and I decided to leave. At that point Sam was just fucking around in the 5-pin bowling side, throwing balls in etc. I yell out to him "yo Lin'en, let's get the fuck out of here" and he agrees after he takes a last bowl, but some guy is already kicking him out. Sam turns around and I throw a beer bottle at him, hoping he'd catch it, but he doesn't and it explodes on the bowlerama floor with the dude still standing there looking at us. We make a mad dash for the door and make it out safely, but will we return?

I got drunk for the first time in two weeks and shit it feels good.

To set the record straight 

I was there as long as it existed, before and after it was named. I am as familiar with crass struggle as any of you, and have been on the front lines from the start. Just cause I wasn't there while you were drinking darft and speaking explicitly the words of awfulution doesn't mean I don't have feelings.

Improv highlights!
  • During a scene about dancing shoes in a nightclub: "Let's have a beatoff!"

  • The amount of candy they hoard in the volunteers' green room! Twizzlers, sour keys, chips, mini eggs, pop, kool-aid jelly things, cookies... there was more that I didn't try even.

  • Hot former Orangeville chicks. Also, hot Aussie Stage Managers. (Just exotic enough.)

  • Cussin' backstage. Lots of cussin'.

  • A Style event in the style of a CIG improv night. About Taxidermists.

I shadowjudged, btw. It was cool. I was way off on a couple that I either really felt or didn't feel, but mostly I was pretty well on par with the real judges' scores. So I feel good.

Oh and I'm timekeeping tomorrow's wildcard round. Big Ben returns triumphantly and by overwhelming request. Aye, request. It really makes a Big Ben feel wanted.

PS. If you want info on how abouts to do html tricks on this baby, truck on over to Webmonkey's neat little html cheatsheet. That'll give you a veritable arsenal of ways to punch up plain text. The stuff relevant to you begins with "Text Tags" and ends with "Graphical Elements".

Hmm :S 

Clearly a little knowledge is a dangerous thing.

How do you close up bolds, italics and underlines?

It all began... 

A) No, Ben, "fuck you". New Awfulism has existed for months between only me, Meyers and Benji. I coined the term myself to summarize a shared ethic that I believe exists between the three of us. This opening up of New Awfulism to the broader public should be considered a gift and not something that merits us to be told to fuck off just because Whitebox felt the need to write about the movement which he had a hand in founding for his Poli Sci class. I think that's a run on sentence. If I seem more harsh than I should be at you for this minor "fuck-off", bear with me as I relate the gruesome details of the last 22 hours.
B) Filafel Hut Village, 1:30 am Friday (pub night). This guy rushes up at this other guy and says "What's up now, ni__a!?" (both men are of middle eastern descent) They begin to tustle and a fist fight looks imminent until the janitor and his buddy (who has no job at York) break up the fight and instruct them to take it outside. By now there are four guys backing one guy and the other guy has only one backer.
C) Friday, 4:00 pm. Get a little high and go buy a 2-4 (24 beers, Jacob). We discover a shopping cart tipped over beside the beer store. We decide to put the 2-4 into the shopping cart and push it; we discover while doing this that the cart lilts to the right. My friend decides he wants to ride in the shopping cart. I oblige him and push the cart as fast as I can. The cart gains too much momentum and pulls right off the street, landing in the mud where he jumps out. He pushes me in the cart and for some reason lets go of the cart, sending me flying into the mudbank much harder. I hop out but the cart tips over. We hear a clash. Inspecting the cart, two beers have met their deaths.
D) 7:00 pm, Winters Res. Drink at my res room, go get free BBQ and it's all good. Decide to leave finally and go bowling but there is a dilemma. My friend has lost his wallet. Inspecting my room it cannot be found. So I send the beers off with a different friend while I go search the shopping cart route with the first mentioned friend who lost his wallet. Needless to say, wallets don't just sit around at Finch and Keele, they get taken. The wallet was not recovered and because of the near hour I spent looking for it I was unable to go bowling which was the original plan.
E) Four beers in me, I walk back to res. I attempt to climb a tree (Sam seems to enjoy it whilst drunk) but I am unsuccessful - the tree is too wet and I am wearing the wrong shoes. At one point on the uneventful walk back (no music, even) I give the screwface to a passing motorist who may or may not notice. The screwface tactic fails to amuse even me.
F) But why should I complain? My problems are miniscule when you consider them. This is called a dilemma, not even an entire day wasted. I had some fun earlier on. I feel glad that I genuinely feel appreciative.

Friday, April 02, 2004

Success, the destroyer of work ethic 

A few weeks ago, I was faced with three assignments all due in quick succession for three classes. The way it worked out was this: I started my CSC258 assignment at T-minus six hours to deadline, without the slightest idea of how the hell to go about it.

It got handed back today. 37/40, or 92.5%.

Now how am I supposed to be motivated to start my assignments early, be diligent and all that crap? I've seemingly beaten the system. I really haven't though, because all of this slacking will eventually catch up to me. I'd rather be taught a lesson in a second year course than in a fourth year course. As it stands I'm just going to be coasting for another indefinite period of time.

The obvious question to ask is "If you can consciously realize that your slackerdom is a bad habit that must be broken, why can't you consciously break the habit?" The truth is, it doesn't work that way. There needs to be a catalyst, something to convince me beyond the shadow of a doubt that I'm on the highway to Disasterville. The mile marker that should've been by the side of the road today wasn't there. So I'll just keep cruising. Sigh.

Bought My Textbook 

What with my history exam next week I decided that I should buy the textbook. Cheapsack that I am (Yes, that means I haven't forgotton about the money, Benji :P) I didn't want to buy it at the bookstore for their vastly inflated price. Oy, the prices here. It's not just the bookstore, $4 for a package of crispers at the campus store for example. It's not tuition, this is where they make their money. But I digress. So I decided to buy a used copy off the internet.

After a while I found a seller and agreed to meet him in the library. He was selling it for $35 (off the $69 retail) and I had two twenties and a five. Well I assumed he'd have a ten or a five or the equivelent in change. But he didn't. So naturally I raised my voice slightly (only slightly, this is a library) and asked if anyone had any change. The few that didn't shun me by turning away into their books, shock their heads no. Well I needed to start reading this textbook right away, so rather than admit defeat I marched up to the library counter. "Can I have change for a twenty, please?" I asked politely. "No," the woman shot back, "We don't make change here". Don't even get me started on the librarians. I had a book out for an essay once and they remanded it right in the middle of reading week. So I could either get on a bus and go back to Queen's to return it, or I could pay their extravagent fine when I returned at the end. I pleaded my case but they gave me no ruth. But this time I defeated them. Smiling craftily I pushed over the $20 and asked, "Very well, put 10ยข's on my photocopy card. And she was vanquished and the textbook was bought!

What a night 

At 2am Saturday morning I was talking to Sharon on MSN. She told me about the movie she did to fufill the creative component of her Introductory Seminar Week (Frosh week) staff application. When I said I'd love to see it she invited me over right then so she could show it to me. She lives on the other side of the river so I pulled on my shoes and trudged across the bridge in the rain.

After watching her video (which was very funny) Sharon suggested we watch one of her newly downloaded episodes of Friends. She had a cappachino early and was in no mood for sleep so she said we should just settle down and have a Friends marathon, she had dowdloaded the first 11 episodes of season 10. I had nothing to do that day so I agreed.

At around 6 am, having watched the first 7 episodes we went out to watch the sunrise. This was pretty uninspiring becaus the sky is 100% overcast. So, we continued walking around the whole campus. We climbed onto the roof on the science complex which is covered in turf. We walked up one of the trails on the drumline and from the top we got an impressive view of the surrounding area.

We walked back to her room and watched the last 4 episodes. Sometime during episode 11 we fell asleep curled up on her bed.

When we woke up it was about 9:45 and I went home to Lady Eaton College and delicious pancakes with pure maple syrup that had been taken from trees on out very own drumline. I took my pancakes down to the common room where a dozen people were watching Canadian Bacon as part of the end or classes Dionysis par-tay.


I pretty much gave up my evening last night to improv, which was cool and all, but it sure wasn't gettin' drunk. However! I am officially timekeeping for the Saturday afternoon wildcard round, so that means I'm onstage and everything, wee. Also last night I shadow-judged, so I'm heading off on that weird and wonderful path, and I totally met Alistair, the Head of all Improv (he is cool).

But yeah, I got back at like 12, and there was fuck all to be done. I ended up watching the Passion of the Christ with some friends. You know what? I fucking loved it. It was awesome. And hella scary.

I'm still not down with that Jesus shite though.

I actually haven't slept yet. I spent the time in between the movie and now helping my friend out with a last-minute project makin' diaramas! It was like being in grade six, seriously. It was so last minute, all we had was cardboard, cotton balls, paints, and gum pretty much. Actually it looks really good. We're like modern day diarama McGuyvers. A new hidden talent.

LEO MEYERS BENJI: What the fuck? you go and write New Awfulism while the rest of us are asleep or something? Fuck you.

Chug Chug Chug Chug Chug Chug... uh... Math? 

April Fool's Day jokes were somewhat scarce. People were somehow surprised that I wasn't perpetrating more of them. When I was asked at 11am, I bleakly replied (without even looking up from my reading) that I wasn't really in a joking mood ever since the doctors told me I had a malignant tumour. The girl who'd asked me was stopped in a moment of shocked silence; only after about 5 seconds did it dawn on her that she'd been had. I'm cruel but I'm brilliant.

I for one am coveting all of the fine merchandise that hit the shelves this fine April the 1st. I'm just dying for an EZ-Bake oven in my computer, and perhaps some furry little creatures to feed my EZ-Baked goods. Or... to cook in my EZ-Bake oven? Also of note, a really cool new version of Quake was released today. Genius! Fucking genius! I wonder if there's a "fall into lava" command.

Today was Thursday. Thursday means one thing to a first year UofT Computer Science student: MAT137 problem sets are due. MAT137 (titled "Calculus!", hah hah stupid math joke) is probably one of the most difficult courses offered at the university - it consists of 3 ridiculously difficult term tests, an exam, and of course the dreaded problem sets, which are bombardments of 8-12 hours of rigorous abstract calculus every fucking week, due every Thursday at 6:10pm, no lates, no exceptions. This week was the very last problem set was due. I, of course, forgot about this, and decided to let the problem set do itself for a change. Each problem set works out to approximately 0.5% of one's term mark: that much work hardly seems worth it for a lousy half-percentage point (that's potentially, assuming your solutions to the marked questions are correct, which they rarely all are). Of course, this liberation from the shackles of the calculus course (which I'm incidentally not doing too well in) freed up the whole afternoon for me. So I did what seemed to be the natural thing to do.

I began drinking.

Myself and one Adrian H. hit Einstein's, the local pub, for two pitchers of their house brew and some interesting yet very geeky conversation about some really messed up programming language he likes. Along with the beer, I ordered a poutine, which turned out to be quite cheap given the amount of food ($2.75 for a heaping plate of fries, cheese and gravy - better than Burger King by a fair margin). I guess my empty stomach at the time we commenced drinking lowered my tolerance a bit, because I was somewhat tipsy when I went back to school. What followed was a hillarious jaunt about the CS undergraduate lounge and the computer labs.

Around six o'clock when everyone was heading off to go hand in their problem sets, who shows up but Tim, itching (of course) to go drinking. Egads, more ale? Sure. So we back to Einstein's, ordered another pitcher of the house brew (it's cheap on Thursdays). More geeky conversation ensued, different topics, same beer.

All in all it was a fairly good day. I drank far too much, as became evident when I began to sober up and the hangover-without-sleep hit me like a 2x4 in the back of the head. Now sober, somewhat sleepy, a smile creeps across my face, as I plan for the weekend. I am an alcoholic in training. This is my story.

Thursday, April 01, 2004

Divine Malevolence. 

After my last post the day got progressively better.

Arts (James) was duct taped into his room. He tried to get out - failed - and then jumped out of his window (unfortunately his room is on the first floor). HOWEVER, after he ripped all of the tape off of his door, he went to open it and realized he'd chain locked it, and so had to go around and climb BACK through the window to get into his room. We've got a picture of him climbing through the window. It was rich.

We joined forces for a short time then, and ran over to west 2, the residence next door to us. There's been a bit of rivalry between the two houses this term, so we thought it was only fitting to band together our incredible fooling genius - and thus, they lost their power.

Fuse box + out in the open = Too much temptation to resist.

Needless to say, Ben (waterloo Ben) lost his power too :D All's fair in pranking.

After that, I went to class, and when I came back I realized how fragile alliances really were. People get stabbed in the back constantly, but no one ever expects it to happen to them. Quite frankly, I was more worried about two of the west 2 people who saw me beside the fuse box - it could have gotten messy there. But they proved to be the least of my problems. Arts, Mike and Mohammed BROKE INTO my room and looted my drawers.

This included my underwear drawer.

They took pictures holding up my underwear -- and they were all particularly amused by the red thong that said "sexy" Stas had gotten me for Valentine's Day. Yes, yes, laugh it up - they certainly did. Their plan is to put it on the network. If you all had ANY idea about the embarassing pictures they've got of me on that network...

At noon, however, we reached an agreement, and their boxers were swapped for the entire dresser they stole from my room. How they got in, I'll never know, but I have a sneaking suspicion my house mom might have let them in. Hmmm.

After that, we sat around and did nothing. I went out to dinner at East Side Mario's with Neil (waterloo Neil) because he was being chauvinistic and made a stupid bet (briefly: I ran into him on the bus back from Toronto, and he'd said that if my suitcase didn't have wheels, we both knew who'd be carrying it. I'd told him that I didn't need a guy to carry my stuff around for me, and so with dinner on the line, he said I couldn't carry it across campus. It was pride more than anything, and I lugged that bloody thing, panting and sweating, all the way to rez. Dinner was well worth the effort.)

Now...to finish my German assignment and then go for a run.

Not a very impressive April 1st on the whole, but what can you do?


I failed to mention above that we gave back ALL of their boxers except for ONE PAIR of each. To put what we plan to do delicately:

"Holy fucking Jesus my balls are on FIRE"


Alas, no pranks today 

I was quite disappointed in the late of pranks today (unless you count the fact that I got about 10 fax-machine calls this morning). I mean I thought there'd be high-larious pranks (This is university after all) and there were none. It's like finding out that there's not only is there no Santa, but you had thought Santa was 10 feet tall and had a wide assortment of crazy superpowers.

Of course I slept in late today so I might've missed it all.


50 points Leo!

Meal cards are great, when you discover at the end of the year you have 120 dollars and only 3 days left of being on campus. Down to 80 now, but I'm goin' ape with it!

Ok, now I'm off to go geek it up, Lord of the Rings and video games await!


Garfield: Hey Apple, did you really get to dump a bucket of ice cold water on Atly?
Apple: Ugh. Yes. I. Hi. Did. But. She. ugh. Just. Let. It. Happen.
Garfield: Wow, that's great! Tell my good friend Powercade about it. Don't you wanna hear about it, Powercade?
Powercade 5000: SURE-WHY-NOT?
Apple: Ugh. I. Thought. University. Hi. Would. Be. Different.

"Water" loo. AND it's pissing rain for the 3rd straight day... 

Honestly, people need to be more original.

Hanging outside my door all night, just for the chance to dump a bucket of cold water on my head when I wake up in the morning -- it's cheapened when the dumpee actually tells the dumper to get it out of their system, and they comply, don't you think?!

Of course, they were right to be a bit put out. Calling yourselves the best pranksters in the 'loo and then being outdone by three girls, who, on a whim, steal *all* of your boxers and socks and ketchup your conditioner after you've been suckered into playing Mario Kart so that you leave your room accessible IS a bit frustrating. It's payback for 5 a.m. wakeup calls and previous water dumping - we're not needlessly cruel.

To the boys here: Recycle or Commando? :D

The great thing about April Fool's Day is that it *IS* a DAY. And it's on.

Happy Fooling.

Duct tape has such a pretty colour.

P.S. Ben, Leo's right...no "e" in Atly - if WB can be WB, can I get switched too?? Leo: Means a lot that you approve of the pic - it was tough, until I thought: "WWLD?" It's what gets me through my day.

Fully sated. 

So who's the best since Sticky fell off? I think it's Canibus. At least vocally he sounds like Stick, rhyme-wise I have to say he's superior even if he doesn't go as dark in terms of subject matter.
It's 1:20 and I'm full of Wendy's. I am considering a shower just to add to the whole baroquely warm, logy, full and comfortable effect. Classes are done so I spent 3.5 hours playing SNES today. Awww, so awesome. All the pent up SNES desire sated.

What. The. Fuck. 

Wednesday, March 31, 2004

Somebody shoot me, with a big fucking gun. 

What's the first item on the agenda? Wait, there's an agenda?

I just got a pile of work sent to me by my job, for completion by morning. This is rare, but since two industry conferences are going on this week in D.C. and Vegas there's more to do than usual. So long as my @!#$ing paycheque gets here tomorrow, I won't have to kick any corporate ass.

To complement what I said earlier about downloading music and such, it seems that us Canadians aren't up a shit creek yet. As I'm sure many you have heard (or haven't), the courts have sided against the CRIA in the matter of whether the ISPs could be ordered to turn over the names of suspected filesharers. Hooray for privacy rights.

I'm anxious to hear more of this Awfulism people keep talking about. It sounds like my kind of philosophy/anti-philosophy.


WhiteBox is called WhiteBox now.

Why didn't I think of that before? I mean really.

I'm disappointed in myself. And all of you, too, for not pointing that out.

Second item on the agenda: the New Awfulist Manifesto. We gotta get that party started.


Firstly none of the money is Ben or Sam's. Secondly, yes Ben, I don't think I'll take (much) cause we do want to do a table this year.

Second thing: I feel the need for warpstone
no good will come of this...

Rhyming and Stealing 

Under the newly documented New Awfulist theory this isn't even a moral dilemma. The real dilemma is: how much money can you scam from these schmucks before they catch on? If they are dumb enough to entrust you with their money they deserve to be taken for all they're worth.

T'is not thievery 

Neil - It sounds like a perfectly fine thing to do as long as you're going to be putting it back to where it came from.

Take the money 

I don't think what you're doing is stealing per se. Of course if you're not going to give it back it would be, but I'm sure you will (They can hunt you down with a few lucky rolls on a d20 after all!) I agree with Ben, mooching from Sam would be a supremely ironic event (like rain on your weddding day).

You ever tell a joke and there's silence and you get a big laugh? And you wonder, did it just suddenly sink in or are they laughing at you for telling a very stupid joke?

Money money money money money 

I think my money's in there too or something Neil. I don't care really. But what if we want to use it this summer?

Leo: Sam has money in there? Do you realize how humourous this proposition is?

My poli sci TA is the fucking greatest. She bought us BEER(!) in the AB(!) for our last tutorial. It was kind of funny: in a class of like 24 people from all different faculties, six of us are film production majors. And out of our whole tutorial, only us six went with her to the Ab. That means film people are the best. Also the best is my TA for buying us beer (Moosehead).

That is all.

Scruples, iPods and Chow-Mein 

Regarding Neil's dillemna - so long as you're relatively certain you'll be able to reimburse the fund before anyone knows it's gone, I say go for it. What they don't know can't hurt them, or even so much as make them mad. That's the beauty of being the treasurer.

On the subject of iPods... yes, they're great, but make sure you ditch the headphones, else you might get mugged. Status symbols come with a price larger than the five bills to actually buy the damn things.

As for stealing music, our friends south of the border won't be so casual about it if the senate gets their way. Everybody's favourite corporation-whipped imbecile has joined with another senator in supporting the Protecting Intellectual Rights Against Theft and Expropriation Act, or PIRATE Act (in the tradition of the PATRIOT Act; these Americans really like their acronyms). Basically, it scales back the burden of proof necessary to nail P2P users and send 'em to jail for up to 10 years, even for a single file. Read Senator Hatch's brilliant remarks, keep in mind this is the same genius who said that "Capital punishment is our society's recognition of the sanctity of human life." The USA is great. They really do have the best government money can buy.

Ken Ho's Chinese food truck, a staple of the U of T Computer Science student's diet, has been absent from St. George Street for three whole days now. Despite the gas it causes, Ken's food has become a part of life. Hopefully he's not dead or something.

Robbin' Ape 

As for the Vector Bar, don't bother. As for stealing from the dweebs, nerds, goonies and geekoids who built you up, I say take from them. The only one who will find out about your shenigans that has been affected by them is Sam and maybe Ben. And you can square up with them. Pay them back, they're your friends.
And yes, you are asking the wrong crowd. In a dream last night I explained why my iPod was such a great symbol. It says "I love music, I'm rich and I steal (music)".
P.S. - Atly - (there's never been an "e" in Atly) great photo. I was truly surprised. (But I could tell the photo was of a girl!)

Asking the wrong crowd... 

Ok. I have a moral dilemma here, and this time its not about eating a 10 month old half of a vector bar.

I am completely and totally broke now, and will remain that way until I get some work in the summer. This, as can be imagined sucks. However there is one small chance. I still have the treasury for the old gaming club I used to run, and may start again in the summer. So would it be wrong of me to borrow this $80.00 and have some money for the last month of school? Or am I human scum.


I have a terrible sense of time anyhow. I remember most things, just horrifically out of sequence and with no accounting sense of the passage of time. The whole "biological clock" idea has to be bullshit - either that or mine is stopped.

Case in point: I sat down in the computer lab at school the other day in mid-afternoon, and after only a few minutes it was 9-fucking-PM. I also realized at that point that I hadn't eaten in those six hours that were magically lost, or for several before that. It's times like these when you learn how good Burger King can taste.

So, yes, it was two years ago. Wow. Well, stranger things have happened.

"And what would you like for lunch young man?" 

Never fully appreciated my camera evasion techniques until I sat down and started rifling through my photo albums. It was something like:
"Hey look, I think that's my arm."
"Oh, that's me covering my face."
"Not me. Not me. Not me. Not me. Mm...oh lord, the braces."

This year, any pictures that were taken of me involved me being (a) drunk and (b) doing generally stupid things. They often occurred together. You won't get me in front of a camera any other way. They steal souls. I've read R.L Stine too - he knew what he was talking about.

So I finally settled for the pic you see on the left - I had it up as my MSN avatar for a while, and the first thing people asked when they saw it was "why do you have a little boy as your MSN avatar?"

Grr. So this is me. Honors Bio major at the University of Waterloo.
The resident vegetarian (converted back to meat on New Years as resolution - damn halal Lamb)/Feminazi...
Goin' ape.

Thanks for inviting me into the club, boys.

It wasn't last year 

it was a couple years ago.
But hello anyways.

Just when you thought it was safe... 

Well then.

I'm Dave. Many of you know me as "that guy who was at Ben's birthday last year". I am the Dave of many myths and legends. I am, however, not, I repeat not in any way affiliated with Super Dave Osborne.

I have been asked to share in this bubbling pot of ego-stroking and feta cheese. So I shall. Yes, I shall.



Tuesday, March 30, 2004

Denmark Invades Canada! 

Denmark has attacked our country just like their bloodthirsty ancestors, the Vikings. A Danish warship has landed, occupied and put up the flag of Denmark on Hans Island. The island may be a "barren rock in the high Arctic" but goddamn it it's our barren rock in the high arctic. If the Danes think that we're going to take this then they're seriously mistaken! Our reaction should not be one like that typical Dane, Hamlet but one of swift anger. We should send our ship to this Island and evict the Danes. Then who knows, bomb Denmark? Funnel arms to Norway to get them to do our dirty work? I don't know, but we need to do something.


I could be LARPing right now... 

However I am not. I have chosen the right thing and decided to study for tomorows test instead. So that is what I'm doing. Right now. At this very moment.


I think in regards to SM we should just do ocasional posts in response to other posts, otherwise leave 'em be.

I'll post again when I actually have something to say, thought I did but I guess I don't.

The pinnacle of apathy 

Today I had my final test for my evolution class. There's no exam. This was it.

I didn't go.

See I have a good reason, like, it's only the top three test marks that they use to generate a grade. My last test was a 68%, so definitely not a great mark, but I calculated it out that I ought to get like a 70 in that class, so I'm content with that.

But thing was, I was going to go and just randomly fill in those awful little bubbles and see what kind of mark I'd get. Like, not even READ the questions, just circle answers. And my class was a three minute walk from me. And I had been awake and showered for hours. But I didn't go. It could hardly even begin to be described as work, and I didn't go. It could have been FUN even, and I didn't go. I just schlubbed about all day in utter uselessness.

It was awesome.

PS. everyone when you use the quick-blogger-thing, you can erase the code that pops up automatically. In fact, do delete it, it's just a link to this page.

Goin' Ape 

Today we had our last lecture for history, it was really just a large roundtable discussion. The theme of the course was Terror, so in the last 5 minutes the prof who led the discussion said "now here's a terrifying thought: it's 1997 and you wake up to realize this song is at the top of the charts" and then she played Mmmm-bop by Hanson. The 380 students in the lecture hall burst into a cacophony of cheers, laughter, applause and screams.

I have 9 hours of class left, but I still need to figure out how to register for next years classes

This past weekend I brought my bike and baseball gloves out of hibernation. I spent sunday hanging out with my friend Sharon watching Mallrats and playing ultimate frisbee.

Last night around midnight my friend Steph came by and asked if I wanted to play Capture-the-Flag, of course I said yes. So we gathered up as many people we could find, about 25 of us in total. In a move reminiscent of grade 4 we split into boys vs. girls. The girls were confident, they figured they could sweet "talk" their way to the flag. For the first couple games we played around the buildings of Lady Eatin' and Champlain Colleges. It was pretty awesome because the the buildings on campus are all odd shapes with multiple levels which makes it only too easy to climb on the the various roofs. It was 3D capture the flag! After a while a don came out at cussed at us for being loud and also for being on the roof. We were forced to vacate the area and move down the road towards the athletic centre and administration builiding. Once there it was suggested that we have co-ed teams, then some bright light said we should play shirts vs. skins, although there was no shortage of volunteers of either gender someone said we could just play 2nd floor vs. 3rd floor. In the end everyone kept their shirt on except for two guys who went shirtless in the hope that people would hesitate before tackling them. Around 1:30 everyone went back to res, everyone that is but the numerous couples who during the game had quiet slipped off to some secluded area.

Anuther Attempt 

Goin' Ape

I recently made a very long post and it doesn't seem to be showing up. I am making another test to see if this shows up. I screened my film today. It seems it was well received by my peers and even Tereza only had one solid critcism.

O Brave New World 

Just screened my film "The Adjustor". Sounds like it was relatively popular amongst my peers. Skanky Panky by Kid Koala (who, as far as I know, is not some kind of passe, soother-sucking, e-popping, everyone-hugging, glow-stick-waving-in-your-face, passing-out-from-dehydration kind of DJ) definitely worked for the film and I had a couple people ask about it.

Neil: A unified front. I hear that. I, like yourself, am still undecided about how to sever relations with SM. There is certainly a part of me (The New Awfulist) that wants to give a few of the people on that site "personal rejection letters". There is another part of me that is thinking back on the bridges I have intentionally burned in the past and questioning the productivity of that. As for now, the verdict is still out.

Jacob: Way to go with the risky picture. It truly paid off.

Benj: Way to go with the WBesque photo. Great minds think alike. I've even got the cocked eyebrows to a lesser degree.

Goin' Ape For The First Time 

I've never posted on a blog before. Now that I think about it, my blog picture looks quite a bit like meyers'.

Saturday would be my choice for bowling, and GTO disc 4 better be there!

I also got promoted recently at the Future Shop...now I'm doing full commissioned work instead of that partial stuff I had before. Too bad I can't goof around and still get paid for it now though, ahh well.


Goin' Ape

Ok, I've got a question for Leo and Meyers (and Sam if he show's up)

What're you guys going to do with your SM accounts? Are you going to go out in a blaze of vulgarity or a rant about how terrible they all are, or are you going to continue to post? Or you know you could just stop posting, I dunno, I'm just curious cause I think we should present a unified front on this.


Go ape guys. 

If you'll take a moment to click on the date at the top of the page, you'll find a little box pops up, letting you conveniently post without going to blogspot.com and going through all that rigamarole!

Rigamarole sounds like some kind of Italian food. You know, if you pronounce it all Italian-like.

The monkey at the bottom still links to blogspot.com if you want to be a gimp.

Fightin' the Good Fight 

The Vanguard of the New Awfulist Movement have arrived. There are to many weak kneed CoWaRdGhS in the world and the New Awfulists are just the pople to Go Ape on them.

I think we need a theme song.

Maybe I can fix this six line minimum bullshit. 

You'll know if I'm successful. If I'm not, don't wait up for me.

Second Test 

Okay I want to test if links work:
\topurl{http://www.ratemyprofessors.ca/canada/,A prof rating site}
\b{is this also bold}
\red{is this red?}
\greek{Hero's have the whole earth as their tomb}


Wow, thanks guys for inviting me onto the blog.
Let's see how this post works out.
Eee gads, it works.

Just a Test 



Hey Leo and Meyers, I have an account, do you?

sorry an hour 

ok, you've had it for an hour, my bad

(58 minutes! TAKE THAT LEO!)

That was fast... 

You've had it for what, half an hour and already its gone to your head. You're mad. But the blog does rock so we'll let you get away with it (for now).

Night all!


Whose house?


Whose house?


Whose house?



Cool, so do to my habitual going to bed late I get to be the first person to post on here other than Ben who made it. WOO!

We rock


Six lines long.

Press that enter key!

Okay so there are some problems. 

But look: so long as each post is at least three lines long or so, we're cool. I'm not fuckin' rocket scientist, I'm tired, this is fucking good enough.

When in doubt just just enter a couple times.

This is it folks. Zero hour. 

The race is on. This baby is ready an' rarin' to go. Sure it don't look like much, but it's home.

It's kind of funny. I actively cussed out a bunch of people I know for having blogs. I declared at some point that I didn't want anything to do with Petar's awful blog. And yet, a few months later, I was crawlin' on up to him to ask for a space in his streamlined halls.

Actually it's probably a good thing he didn't add me. Now we know he hates me, and hey, we've got our own venue for to post. And if you guys think you can do better, I'm all for it.

Anyways, enough o' this shit. Bedtime.

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a gorilla with no superego.