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Saturday, November 26, 2005


Right now I'm procrastinating and listening to a mixtape my housemate's girlfriend made for him. That's my guess at least, iTunes let's you listen to other people's music and there's a section called "Julie". So either it's her mixtape (mixmp3?) for him, or his for her. Probably her for him because the artists are all marked as "Other". It's pretty shitty actually (e.g. Ashlee Simpson).

I was having a nice conversation with one my housemate's (different one) and she brought up Kinsey which she had just watched and loved. She mentioned how before him people hadn't really known anything about sex. I just thought that was a fun illustration of the differing worldviews of nursing student's and history majors. Their perspective is that only when something isn't really real until it has been studied and codified. Us history majors though tend to think that people knew quite a bit about sex over the years, and puritianism comes and goes in waves. I've been getting pretty disillustioned with history over the years but at least it still has contributed something.

Another housemate lent me the book version of "He Died With A Felafel In His Hand" which was also very funny. The movie created composite characters and pasted together various anacedotes. It's fun reading a little side-bar and going "Hey, I remember that line!" And the sheer craziness of some of things... I mean occaisionally some things past housemates have done have been annoying but at least none of them ever pissed in the fridge (I hope!).

Hypothesis? Awesome. 

On our way home from a concert tonite we stopped at the Subway. Across the street five police cruisers and two police SUVs were pulled up outside Al's Pizza/Yee's Chinese Food (they are the same place). None of us, nor the three staff nor the three other patrons could figure out what no less than seven police vehicles were doing gathered ANYWHERE at 2:30 am, let alone at Yee's Chinese food. I thought that it was probably just something minor, but it was a quiet night so all the other cops on duty had come to socialize cause they were bored. Someone suggested it may be a drug bust, but why would that many cops show up for a drug bust? Another person said that the only time that many cops showed up anywhere was if a cop had been assaulted. Devon said that a disgruntled neighbour probably told the police that Yee's Chinese was harbouring terr'ists. I can just picture the headlines "AL QUEDA BLOWS UP LIFT LOCKS, MAYOR AND YACHT OWNERS SLIGHTLY IRRITATED".

We saw The Spades, Ptbo's favourite local rocker boys, at the Montreal House (MoHo). Fantastic show! First time I'd seen The Spades, glad I finally did. Lots of rocking out and dancing good times. The crowd was a great mix of young university educated folks; older, hard bitten, GE shift workers and bikers. The MoHo is a fucking institution in this town, it's 125 years old and currently owned by the Hells Angels.

Family Circus: Bil Keane's Evil Twin

Friday, November 25, 2005

Don't Buck this up this time... 

lolz. I'm so clever.

Okay, so Leo/Ben/whoever. Another chance to see Buck 65 this Sunday night at the AGO. This time it's a spoken word thing. Should be interesting.

Let me know!


Irrational Anger 

Okay, this is a rant that probably won't seem coherant to anyone who dun't go to Yark, so bear with me.

I have been maddeningly, irrationally angry at Excalibur all week. To the point that just seeing the current issue is enough to destroy any semblance of a good mood I had. Why? I don't know if any of you saw the comics page this week, but devoting two pages to only three comics, AND leaving me out?! That dog won't hunt, monsignior. Anyways, I went down to th'offices to submit my current comic (not pictured) and deliver what was a pretty sarcastic and frankly pissy letter, but on advicefrom our good friend Colleen, decided to see Jade (the editor) personally. Anyways, turns out that, rather than being deliberately left out, the email in which I sent the comic was simply accidentally deleted. I don't know if that's somehow supposed to be better, but honestly, that just pissed me off in a different way. What the hell? How do you accidentally delete an Email? Carelessness is how. No one has the right to act careless in regards to anything that has to do with me! And get paid for it, anyways.

Honestly, I probably wouldn't be as angry as I am if it seemed that that woman had even the slightest shred of interest in her job anymore. It steams me up, it does.

Kay, I'm gonna go have some tea or something now.

He Died With A Felafel In His Hand 

So a little bit ago I mentioned the blog of this awful girl and it looks like I killed it. Or maybe Arizona Man killed it. Or maybe she realized that having a website detailing the entirity of her life with her full name, town and picture on it wasn't that great an idea. Whatever happened it is gone and the blogosphere is that much smaller.

So, I'd like another movie to my recommended list. It's called He Died With A Felafel In His Hand and it's based on an eponymous book that details an Australian drifting through dozens of houses and crazy housemates (it starts off with someone playing golf against the house using toads). Really a great and hilarious movie. There's this one character who is a extentialist lesbian pagen with a Russian-Australian accent. There's one character who kinda remained me of Sam (he moontans). Those crazy aussies.

I got an e-mail from a campus women's group saying that "all students, faculty and staff are welcome to come out?" for auditions for the Vagina Monologues. I wrote back a snarky little e-mail saying that I was assuming they weren't casting back. I got back a very nice and heartfelt note saying that while the actors will be women all other roles are open to men (actually they said all the actors will be people who "identify as women", but me saying that might sound snarky and I don't want to be snarky). So, that was a very nice and earnest reply to my snark. Kudos, feminists.

What's the deal with the blogsearch thing above? It's shit. The weird thing is, blogger has a great search engine hidden in the Posting screen. Why don't they have that one on the blog?

Thursday, November 24, 2005

Interfaith coincidences 

A weird coincidence happened to me yesterday night. I was about to head home when I noticed a friend of mine and decided to catch up with him briefly. "Walk and talk; there's free food available!" he said as he grabbed my arm and led me to an interfaith discussion about Natural Disasters: Divine Warning or Natural Event? (title paraphrased). They had a Jewish, Sikh, Muslim and a Christian speaker.

It was alright, nothing earthshatteringly interesting. The Christian had that slick preacher style, the Jew seemed intensely bored whenever the Christian spoke (after growing up in church, I could sympathize!), and the Sikh and the Muslim would raise their voices when they thought people weren't paying enough attention. Much generalizing was done by all before we were ushered off to get our free meal. For some odd reason, men were given vegetarian food while women had the same meal with some chicken in it. WTF? I know that traditionally when meat was saved for women it was so that they could replace the iron in their bodies lost during menstruation and thus pop out healthy babies in future. I looked at my plate and thought, "I'm not a baby machine!"

The coincidence is that when I finally did get on the bus, there was a Jewish guy next to me. I decided to strike up a conversation by asking if he was at the conference. He wasn't, but we had a pretty great conversation anyway. When we got to Downsview, he randomly saw a friend of his who was a Sikh. We all started talking about York, etc. and eventually religion until our paths diverged.

I found I learned a lot more from the inpromptu discussion, but boy was it wierd. I usually don't talk to people on the TTC but for my conversation to randomly mirror an event I hadn't planned on attending? Weiiiird.

Thirty-five cents less a dollar 

Hey, who wants to go to the Supermarket with me tonight! I think I have a +1 press pass to Buck 65's DJ show tonight and I want someone to go with me! If you wanna dance your ass off, and possible hang out with some industry people, let me know. My # is 1-905-269-5076.


Hey Awesome dudes and dudettes 

For many of us the exam period approaches but after that it is the festive season. Up to 4 weeks of eating lots of awesome food, visiting the with family, shitty TV specials, presents (hopefully) and of course a fucking kick ass New Years Bash. Though last years party at Chez Ben was great, it can be beat. Let's put our collective brain together and start planning something. I suggested, to Neil, a party at some point during the break at the water factory that Ben and I discovered, but he was all like "Waaaah that sounds dangerous, somebody could cut themselves and friends would try to amputate. Flaming oil drums are no good for cauterizing wounds. I suck. Waah." I'm just putting the idea of a guerilla party in an abandoned factory out there for the community.

Alternatively my house here in Ptbo is large, parent-free, probably has reduced risk of cops than most of our houses in T.O., also we have fooseball and an extra fridge. Many of my friends will be staying in town as well.

So let's start thinking. We have 38 days.

Wednesday, November 23, 2005

I swear, 

I saw Mark McKinney getting off the Subway Train at St. Clair West this morning at like, 1:00 pm. I know it sounds ridiculous, what would he be doing there, right? If I had seen him elsewhere I'd tell you guys I was 93% certain. I was like, 3 feet away from him. Under the circumstances, I'm about 80% sure it was him. I really should've yelled something to make sure.

Getting home on the TTC today set a new record. 1 hour, 45 minutes. beli'e dat. 19sucks my neuuuts.

Hey Ben, nice jerb in Clay'n'Robuts Theatre. I commented on how John Greyson taped you and know I git t' edit ye, but I hant seen the footage til today. Ben gotta pretend he was a PLANE. Talk about "Wheee!" but also important. We have to make a political statement using yon footage as well as other footage. I disagree with my editing pardner on important political questions, so our main point is actually going to be how much more effective the Clay'n'Paper Theatre show was than an ordinary demo. Y'know? Art can reach people bether, touch them deeper. CREATE.

Bush bombs the news. Well, almost. 

Bush hates al-Jazeera so much he actually ordered it bombed and had to be talked down by Tony Blair.

I've just emerged from a gauntlet of tedium. Essays are the bane of my otherwise perfect existence. Inquisitor on Saturday, yes everyone?

I am reading The Romance of the Three Kingdoms. It's a huge tale covering roughly one hundred years of Chinese history, and at least 3 tenths of it is exxagerated or totally made up. For instance, one of the good guys standing on a hill, yelling "I'M ZHANG FEI! GRAW!" and scaring away over 100,000 enemy soldiers is probably a fabrication. I just have a feeling. It's a damn entertaining story, roughly 2400 pages in length. It kind of helps to illustrate how completely insane this country was (is?). At least once every fifty pages, someone's family is exterminated. I'm serious. It'll just be "This man displeases me. Exterminate his entire clan and strangle him to death." And it happens ALL the time. Hilarious, and also disturbing. The gates to the capital had bodies adorning them at all times, it seems. There is also a part where the main good guy, Liu Bei, visits a minor official. The official doesn't have any meat to feed him, so he butchers his own wife and feeds him her corpse. When he asks what the meat is, the official claims it is beef. When Liu Bei finds the corpse of the wife and realizes what he'd been eating he WEEPS TEARS OF GRATITUDE and has him promoted. Don't eat meat in China. I'm almost through the first of the four books. ROT3K rapes the Iliad right through its pants.

Tuesday, November 22, 2005

Here's To You, Miss Robinson... 

Q: What's worse than having your boyfriend secretly taping you two having sex and then sending the video to his friends and the internet?
A: Suing him for violation of privacy under a psuedonym and then having your real name given out because of a court error.

So I have an academic question for all y'all (not related to the fact that I did the worst I ever have on an assignment I got back today). I have a course where every 2 weeks I have a test. Only the top 5 tests are counted and I've already done 5. Should I go to this class for the next 2 weeks? If I get perfect on the next test I can raise my total mark by 1.5%. So should I go to class? Doesn't really seem worth it.

Monday, November 21, 2005

Goin' Ape... within the arena of grassroots political actions 

We had our first meeting of the Trent NDP Association on Friday. Twenty people came out which was better than we expected. They came from a wide variety of political experience, marxists, pot heads disgruntled Liberals, recovering Greens, born and raised NDP like Devon and I and some freshed faced first year kids looking to be hit with some hit with some pinko propaganda. Also in attendance was the NDP candidate for our riding and the treasurer for the riding association who was there taking pictures. It was a very productive meeting, much was discussed. We worked out the framework for our constitution which every club needs to get money out of the TCSA (student gov't). Devon and Sam (our co-organizer) became co-presidents and I volunteered to be secretary.

It was a week of UFA alumni. At school I ran into James for the first time (can't remember his last name, went to Ghana), then last night I was at a party and spent some time talking to Emily from UFA, she's in 2nd year.


So, what did I do yesterday? (or Saturday, fo all you "1AM is Monday" purists) Well, perhaps I should let MT Comics tell the tale. These basically tell the story of may day as
1. A change of plans
2. Talk on the way to see a movie
3. The movie's aftermath.
All in all, Jarhead was great.
Other news: Next (not this coming) thursday, the new cook at my restaurant/bar (but not actually new, cuz he's worked there a while blah blah blah boring work stuff) is part of an art exhibition at a place 3 blocks west of Bathurst on Queen. I forget the name, but I can get it if anyone wants to come see. Ben, you like art galleries. Colleen, you're an arts editor. It'll be fun! Free booze, perhaps.

Anyways, off to bed.

Sunday, November 20, 2005


Do I really have to say anything?

Jacob At The Movies 

So I've seen two movies recently.

The first was The Aristocrats which is a documentary on a horrifically foul joke. The joke is pretty much an opening sentence, a closing sentence and in between as much bloodily fluids and digusting acts the comic can cram in. Naturally I loved it. The South Park version of the joke was excellent and Sarah Silverman's unconventional (and libalous!) version was really funny to. Gilbert Gottfried was hilarious, though I don't think his telling of the joke was up to scratch.

Slightly different was Harry Potter and the Triwizard Tournament which I also loved and which (oddly enough) also had sex jokes in it. I'm calling the movie by that title because the director made the sensible decision that the only way he could shoot this film in the time he had would be to cut out all the peripherals. Normally, I'm a book literalist who's opposed to changing what's the book, but I loved what he did with the third test. I guess I don't like it when the director subsitutes in something gratutious (like the warg fight in LOTR) but here he made changes that made the scene work in a cinematic setting. Some of the jokes were a little racier (and awesome!) than I thought they'd be especially with Krum/Hermione and Harry/Moaning Myrtle. I think everyone's read Harry Potter but just in case I'll put this next thing in white text (Highlight to read).

There is an absolutely magnificant tragicomic horror near the end of the movie when Harry is teleports back from the graveyard. He appears with Cedric's body, beaten and bloodied and right away the band strikes up a festive song and the entire school launches into applause. Then people begin looking a little closer and the screaming starts...

Anyway, one of my housemate's told me that a shirt that I thought was old and nerdy is actually vintage and hipstery. Yey!

Y'all are going to hate me for this... 

I've been absent from Goin' Ape for a while...and I've been posting on another blog! *hangs head in shame*. My roomates are working on a house blog, so I added pics to the gallery (check it out if you were at the halloween party!) and made my own blog/gallery for it as well (click on "nanaimo").

I've figured that if I've got time for that, I have time for Goin' Ape! I'll post stuff here much more often, pinky swear it.

Nothing too exciting going on. At work we're insanely busy due to the potential election. I've polled most of Vancouver about the election they had Sat. and will be polling the freaking country in the upcoming federal election. The strange reactions I get never cease to amaze. I've had a single father offer to donate to the NDP if I had dinner with him and in tears tell me he was painfully lonely, I've had people call me a Communist and rant for fifteen minutes and I've had people who answer with, "Hello, this is Shelly; may I ask who is speaking?" only to say "NO SPEAKA ENGLISH" when they find out where I'm calling from. Most hilariously, people will select the most right wing/left wing questions consistently in a poll and then insist that they are "Centre" when asked where they'd put themselves on the political spectrum.

Here's something old but funny. My roomate Dys4ik's logs with a crazy girl who thought he was her boyfriend.

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a gorilla with no superego.