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Saturday, November 20, 2004


AARGH another generation of kids is introduced to the Macerana and the Hampster Dance. Why must the cycle continue? 

On friday night I got roped into chaperoning a dance hosted by the cadets. It was held at the Evinrude community centre. It seemed to be a 17 and under event. I have never in my life seens such a high concentration of prostitots. And what a cornicopia of piercings: eyebrows, tongues, noses, lips and that spot on the chin (I seem think its called a lebray piercing). I saw at least 1 pregnant girl of about 15 years old. I worked the door with Gary, the father of one of our cadets. 516 kids went through the door and we had to frisk the males, all we found were 2 lighters and a pen knife. Gary was quite appalled at the way the kids dress.

The weirdest incident of the night came when I was on the dance floor standing over a spilled bottle of pop while another volunteer got a mop. I felt someone tug on my elbow, I turned around and saw two tiny girls who looked about 12, one made a gesture with her thumb and pinkie finger to indicate a phone and said "call me" the other one said "yeah, will you call me?". I shuddered, it was quite horrifying, all I managed to say was "no that would be very wrong".

There was also a boy in wheelchair who was being pushed around by his sister, who is one of our newest cadets and seems to be a few bricks short of a load. When she saw her friends she let go of the chair and her brother crashed into the wall.

I got to clotheslined one kid who tried to run inside when everyone was leaving. I TOLD him that he would have to wait for his friends outside. He just didn't listen.

In conclusion kids are ugly, dirty, slutty and mean.

I hate people who own Che Guevara merchandise that's why I'm looking for a shirt with either Stalin or Mao on it. Hopefully the damn pople around here (Trent) will see the genocidal side of communist revolution. So if you see a t-shirt with either of those visionaries please buy it I will reimburse you.


Teen Tribe Races Past Man, Girlfriend 

In the St. Clair West Area near Vaughn Road a teen tribe of six members was seen racing past a local man and his girlfriend at roughly 1:20 a.m. Tod Samson, the victim, described the group as half white and half asian between 16 and 19 years old. They apparently shouted "Yae yae, West Side!" after rushing past him. This is believed to be some sort of tribe gang affiliation. Police are still looking for the tribe whose supposed leader is MT, a nefarious Chinese crime boss.

Thursday, November 18, 2004


A grey Nike hat. 

So all week I hant had a night of like, more than six hours of sleep. I am really busy, I still waste some time though.

Today we were shooting the worm movie and uh, it took from 8:30 am to 3:00 pm to shoot a fabulous 8 minutes of film (WOO!). However, it was pretty awesome, because I got to be a giant worm. So, like, we have these massive foam costumes and I just slide one onto me and then slip on the head. The costumes really look pretty wormish once they're on someone. Mind you, they're grey since we're shooting B & W.
But, like, everyone who walked by had to stare and many burst out laughing. There were a couple pople acting all unimpressed / not awed. So there was one guy listening to his "I-Pod" and acting all cool. Let's just say that I happened to be running in the same direction as him after he ignored us. The crew referred to it as 'chasing' but that was their assumption.

Also I was headed to Yerk at 7:45 this morning on the Northbound platform at St. Clair West and I saw this guy who really looked and dressed like Sam, except he was wearing a grey Nike hat. So I got a little closer and it turns out it was Sam. All bleary eyed. In a grey Nike hat! So I asked him, "you have a class at EIGHT THIRTY A.M.?" I was thinking, "why would a guy who's only enrolled in two courses take one at 8:30?" so he pauses a second and then goes, "Oh shit! I'm on the wrong platform! I'm supposed to go to work right now!" and then he dashes off. Wearing a grey Nike hat.


I need Britney Spears related help 

Sam, that was probably one of the most awesomest things you've done (nay, that have ever been done). Mad props.

I have a Scoop-related request for help. One of the articles I got (yes, I got articles, yey!) was on Hong Kong pop singers (I didn't say they were revelent articles). I thought it might be a good idea to have a picture of one of the singers because it takes up more space and people like pictures of asian women.

So I got this picture of pop princess Joey Yung:

As I was looking at it I realized it looked very similar of pictures of Britney Spears I've seen in a simliar pose, both hands up and that mike/headset thing. Now here's my request for help. Can anyone find a picture of Britney (or Christina, or Avril etc) in the same pose. I'm thinking of putting them together and haven't the headline "Seperated at birth"

Thanks in advance.

Wednesday, November 17, 2004


Once Again, I'm a Hero 

So yesterday, I became a hero in two different ways, makinging me twice the human being any of you are!

Firstly, I donated 450ml of my pure, non-infected blood to the vampires that lurk near the bank machines in central square, despite my lifelong fear of needles. Nextly, and more importantly, I did something I've always wanted to do: I told an entire lecture hall that what they were being taught was "nothing but a pack of lies". You prolly already read this in Naomi's post, but I thought it best to re-iterate, as this has been a fantasy of mine for some time. So that's why I get to call myself a hero this time.

Also, today I submitted my special comic for the Excalibur "comics suppliment". "What makes it special?", you ask? "Five panels!", I reply with a wry grin. Also, I wrote some broken chinese into it. Hopefully, Babelfish will serve me well on this one.

It's over!


Best. Headline. Ever. 

From the October 29 issue of our school paper: Mayor appalled by sub-standard housing.

I probably should hunt down my doppleganger but I have no idea who he is or where he lives. Still, I'll be on the lookout.

Last night I got kinda annoyed at the co-op cooks because it was pizza day (yay!) but there were no vegatarian pizzas (boo!). I mean when we're cooking we even make something for the vegan, and she doesn't even show up (actually on monday I added 3 types of cheeses and then butter to the "vegan" dish I was making so I guess this is karma). Eventually a vegatarian pizza came but she cut it in half (these are little pizzas) because they only made 10 (for the vegatarian population of 20). Of course most of those so-called "vegatarians" are actually closet carnivores and really only singed up as veggies to have an option when the meat is bad lookin'. When it's good (like Pizza) they dig in. So I stoped by later and got beacoup surplus vegatarian pizza. So a happy ending.

The Scoop is coming along fine and I hope to have it out by December. So far I have lots of stuff. Actually I uh have Leo and Sam's comics. But surely people will start writing stuff in. Right?


Maaaassssoooooonnssssss 

SEE-


-CRET


SPIIIINNING!


EDIT

For those of you who can't see it...


It's hard to see, but it's there.

Tuesday, November 16, 2004


An ape sort of day... 

I have never seen so many Apers in one day at school all year.

First this morning I ran into Leo while on my way to an 8:30 tutorial, and had a quick chat before I had to get to class. Then I saw Ben walking past with headphones on and basically chased him down. Out of nowhere, Sam was in my grammar class (which he isn't enrolled in). He enjoyed a warm reception by all and then made a dramatic exit five minutes in by declaring, "NO! This is all a pack of lies! How can you just sit here and swallow it?" etc. The entire room was stunned and the prof kept referring back to it. I had my tutorial later with her and it was brought up yet again, as she mused over it. Apparently in the other tutorial the class got a speech from the TA about not stressing out about grades and cracking under the pressure...lol. However the prof says that if it happens again, they're going to call security. Oh no, not York security!

I haven't been up to much lately, been a little stressed about school. A group of folks are interested in starting a Professional Writing paper at York, and if that works out I'm definitely going to have a hand in it.

Hopefully I'll see you guys on campus more often!


The rats are the first to jump ship 

In the past week 6 members of GWB's cabinet have resigned their positions, most prominent among them are Colin Powell and John Ashcroft. Is this a sign of no confidence from his UNELECTED cabinet? Will Dick Cheney and Donald Rumsfeld ever be tried as war criminals? Tune in next week for another exciting episode of Chaos Within!

I've always been floored by the fact that the people highest on the hierarchy of the American government are all unelected. No one got to vote for Condi, Colin, Big Dick or Rummy. How can any of those people be held accountable if they weren't selected by the people? In my opinion that one of the most glaring weaknesses of the American "democracy", to say nothing of the electoral college system.

I've found my exam schedule. I have exams on the 13, 21 and 22 of Dec, so I'll probably be home for the money stealing Nas concert.

Monday, November 15, 2004


Wisdom: 3 

So I was at the dentist's today, and I learned that my wisdom teeth are all impacted. In practical terms, this means that I'll be keeping a mouth of 28 teeth for quite some time, and I'll be keeping my naïveity for a while, too. Fortunately, my other attributes should keep my low wisdom score from completely ruining my character, and it may even be fun to roleplay a character with such a hopelessly low scoring attribute.


Rejected. 

I went to donate blood to Canadian Vampire Services today. You know, to do a lil' sumfin' fo' da kids, t'make 'em jump up'n down, an' shaye they candy'n shit. They poked my finger and made me sit around for half an hour then said that I wasn't eligible to give blood. I've narrowed down the reason for this to either a) my smack habit or b) SARS.

I had a surprise test in German today, Well, a surprise for me, cause I skipped last class. I still rocked it. My teacher actually got kind of angry at me today, cause I missed a lot of her classes but I'm still doing so well. I have resolved not to miss any more classes, though. I paid a buttload for the priveledge of them.

I'm going to go eat icing.


Goin' Ape 

So I have not posted in a while, and I figured I would post now, before attempting do to an assignment in three hours before it is due.

So I was in Toronto for the weekend, but I really sucked and didn't see anyone. I am sorry. Good news however, I now have a copy of Zombies!!! 2: Zombie Corps(e). It takes place on an army base, so rocket launchers,jeeps, dynamite and landmines are available for use in killing zombies a second time.
Also I think I've figured out what I want to do school wise for now. I think I want to dig up bones. Paleoanthropology quite possibly. Shouldn't be too suprising to some of you (Leo, Sam and Jacob) who probably rember digging holes in grade 2 in an attempt to find dinosaur bones. But yeah, it is a cool thought that I have figured it out.

Yeah, Jacob that guy does look like you. You should kill him before he kills you and steals your balcony. And on the subject of stealing random crap look here.

We should pull a stunt some time, possibly using Meyer;s gun powder.

Sunday, November 14, 2004


An Update 

Beleive me, if I had anything to say, I'd post more often.

So anyways, yesterday me an' Leo was heading home from Matt's after our p[lans to do something with Neil *ahem* fell through. So anyways, we were waiting to get on the streetcar with these two guys, one of whom was kinda drunk and the other of whom was DREEEEUNNNNk. So the streetcar comes, the drunks don't have the correct change or something, and proceed to get in a TEN MINUTE LONG arguement with the driver over why they should be let on, getting progressively louder and angrier as they go, 'cause we all know how well people respond to loud, angry drunks. Anyways, after threatening to get the driver fired (the Dreeunk one aid something about 'My uncle's on the TTC [drunken mumbling] board..."), they get kicked off, and the streetcar goes off on it's merry way. That should've been it, but because the streetcar was stopped while the driver was making his report, the drunks had gotten ahead of the streetcar and THREW A BRICK AT IT! Now, this was not very smart of them, because, due to the driver's report, the police were at the VERY NEXT STOP waiting for his story. Needless to say, when the streetcar stopped, it was pointed out that the perps were "just over there. Look behind you." and they was nabbed. A classic. Anyways, the story ends on an anticlimax, as the kids were basically just given a stern talking to and let on their way by the cops. Fucking white kids...


Doppleganger! 

One of the interesting things about cooking is that the knife gradually becomes an appendage of your body. It doesn't leave my hand when I'm not cutting with it, I gesture with it, move stuff with it and hopefully won't start scratching itches with it. I think that I'm going to want good knifes for myself at some point. Of course co-op cooking for a hundred people is very different than cooking in my house. It's not just the fact that in the co-op kitchen there's all kinds of food, spices and equipement (They even have a deep fryer!) it's the whole atmosphere's different. When I was cooking on monday I made several different polish dishes. Tonight I made Mac n Cheese. But I did replace the milk with Campbell's Cream of Mushroom soup, so maybe I am beginning to get more exotic in my at home cooking. Oh yeah, I cook in co-op on mondays. Think I mentioned that earlier, but I might not have.

Speaking about co-op, The Scoop (the newspaper which for some reason I am editor of) is going nicely. I put up a series of ads I made which featured a picture of Snopp Dogg with the words "Scoop Yeah!" on it and then information and contact info. Nada. Then I had a mass e-mail sent out and I got several responses. So my advertising skills suck. The main reason people are writing of course is that co-op requires us to do 3 hours a week in an assigned job, but then also 3 hours a term in a miscellaneous job. As Scoop Editor I can assign hours. I'm sure I won't abuse that power in any way.

Anyway, I asked for pictures from the halloween party so I could give them funny captions. There's one with someone dressed up as the Bride, Gogo and Sophie all standing together and I can't think of something funny (the others might not be funny either, but at least I thought of something). Anyway I was looking through the pictures and saw myself. Then I looked closer and I was like "WTF? That isn't me!"


I looked a little closer and then realized I was in the picture after all:


So does this guy look like me? Or is it just superficial?

Edit: Trying to fix pictures. Sympatico's free webspace evidently does not work if you're not connecting via sympatico... so I'm trying some random free image hoster.

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a gorilla with no superego.