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Friday, June 30, 2006


I hate Huckapoo 

I can't believe this is still happening in the music world. What I find most distressing about the whole Huckapoo fiasco is the 14 year old girls being exploited and used as sexual objects for 40 year old pedophiles. Don't these kids have parents? Who the fuck would let their kids flash their knickers all over the internet as an enticement to buy into arguably the worst manufactured band of all time (as some have said...)?

The 'Creator' of Huckapoo made up names for the girls that were supposed to be "larger than life". Best line in the article: "Twiggy Stardom was supposed to be Twiggy Stardust, until Lukow’s lawyers warned him that David Bowie wouldn’t be happy about that, and Joey Thunders began as Cherry Bomb, which turned out to be the name of an actual porn star."

Well, enough with that... I still haven't been paid from the job at York that I've been t for two months now. I was supposed to get a cheque for $1000 yesturday, but of course it hasn't come. Either one of my neighbours got it and threw it out, or the post office burned it, something like that... I'm going home this weekend. Fuck money. I hate having to worry about getting evicted. Fuck.

Have a great Canada Day weekend.


Francis E. Dec, Esquire 

Kook museum display

The rants are really exceptionally confusing unless you understand this crazy man uses long strings of nouns to describe things.

In other news, my friend Robert is creating a fake movie trailer about Bad Dudes vs. Dragon Ninja, the hilariously bad 80s videogame. If you want in on the fun, just contact me, or him if you know how. We need a lot of ninjas, and a bad dude. And someone who looks a little like Duke Nukem.

Thursday, June 29, 2006


Yeee-HAW 

The Motion Picture Association of America has recruited soccer (or futebol) legend Pele as the new spokesman in their crusade against piracy. If you get caught with downloaded movies Pele will personally come to your home and kick a penalty shot with your head.

The trailer for Spider-Man 3 is on the inter-web. Are you ready for Topher Grace as Venom. Yes, that Topher Grace.
---->

My new favourite TV channel is ESPN Classic. They show American Gladiators AND Rollerderby!

If you ever get a chance watch The Professional (1994)about a hit man (Jean Reno) who adopts a twelve year old girl(Natalie Portman) and reluctantly teaches her his trade.

I'm back in Toronto on Saturday. Who wants to go to the beach/baseball game/llama rodeo?

Wednesday, June 28, 2006


Where I at? 

"Guess what I got!"
"A new pony?"
"Nope."
"A hat?"
"Neuh."
"A carpet shampooer?"
"Not even close."
"What then?"
"My new summer class(es)!"

Yeah, this monday I started both my NATS course, every monday-thursday for the next month, and my new longform improv course on monday nights.

So if anyone's been wondering "where Sam at?" He's at his classes.

But I still have time to do fun things.

Monday, June 26, 2006


"I hate pickles, I hate everything about them. Pickles are destroying my life!" 

Oh my god.

That has to be fake, right? People don't get phobias about vegetables, do they? Apparently they do, and it's called lachanophobia, though that website seems to suggest it's a general fear of vegetables, not specific to any one vegetable (let alone pickles, wtf), though I guess stranger things have manifest themselves in the minds of some.

Anyway the cruelty displayed by Maury and his staff is both horrible and oddly amusing.

Sunday, June 25, 2006


And people wonder why the British empire crumbled 

Goat demoted for parade incident

LONDON, England (AP) -- A British army regiment's ceremonial pet goat was demoted in disgrace after it marched out of line before a host of international dignitaries during a parade to mark Queen's Elizabeth II's birthday, a military spokesman said Saturday.

Best part:
Since his demotion, soldiers of a lower rank are no longer expected to salute Billy as a sign of respect, Coates said.

So there were British soldiers somewhere saluting a fucking goat up until a few days ago. Brilliant. Just brilliant.

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a gorilla with no superego.